In this week’s newsletter you will read a commentary, “Say It Ain’t So, Joe,” where I argued that we should give the benefit of the doubt to legendary coach Joe Paterno, who should have done more to assure that the accusation that former coach Jerry Sandusky raped a young boy in a Penn State shower room was brought to the …
COMMENTARY: “Say it Ain’t So, Joe” 748.4
“Say it ain’t so, Joe” These words, directed at Shoeless Joe Jackson as he emerged from a courthouse where he and seven other White Sox players were accused of taking bribes to manipulate games, expressed the profound sense of betrayal and disappointment suffered when an idol falls from grace. Though Jackson, one of the finest players of his era, claimed …
COMMENTARY: Favorite Quips 748.3
As a break from heavy thoughts about heavy matters, I’d like to share with you a list of some of my favorite quips collected over the years. I don’t know the original sources of these one-liners, but they definitely weren’t from me. 1) If women can have PMS, then men can have ESPN. 2) If quitters never win and
COMMENTARY: The Cowboy Code 748.1
I grew up in much simpler times. Television was in its infancy and the idea of a hero was exemplified by a white-hatted cowboy. There was a clarity and simplicity to the moral code of these heroes that left no doubt that there is a right and wrong. As I became more sophisticated, it was easy to ridicule these simplistic …
OBSERVATION: Enjoy the struggle
F. Scott Fitzgerald said that the most profoundly redeeming qualities of life are found not in moments of pure happiness or pleasure, but in the deeper satisfactions that come out of struggle. The Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard put it another way: “Life must be understood backward, but lived forward.” Thus, we need to regularly remind ourselves to learn from the …
COMMENTARY: We Are What We Think 746.4
In the early 1900s, a little-known philosopher named James Allen wrote a powerful essay called “As a Man Thinketh” in which he argued that we are what we think, that a person’s character is the sum of his thoughts. He declared that the power to control our thoughts (whether we use that power or not) is the ability to mold …
Better Isn’t Always Good But It’s Always Better 746.2
I am recording this Lagos, Nigeria. I’m here to meet with private citizens and government officials to talk about bringing CHARACTER COUNTS! to Nigeria’s schools. If you grunted a cynical “good luck” and thought about scam e-mails, street vendors selling counterfeit designer purses and sun glasses and the country’s reputation as one of the most corrupt in the world, you’ve …
If You Were Arrested for Kindness 744.4
If you were arrested for kindness, would there be enough evidence to convict you? Some people cheer up a room by entering it, others by leaving it. What do you bring to your interactions with workmates, friends, and family? Is it encouragement, optimism, or kind words? Or is it pessimism, criticism, or cynicism? People often forget what we say and …
Can Gloomy Gus Become Cheerful Charlie? 743.5
Bad stuff happens. People get sick, lose a loved one, get fired, and make mistakes. Though these events are facts that become a permanent part of our history, the quality of our lives is not determined by the number or nature of our bad experiences, but how we interpret and react to them. Most of us have a default position …
Converting Pessimists into Optimists 743.3
Every full life has its bright days and its dark days, its triumphs and defeats, its calm and stormy seas. All these high and low experiences could justify viewing the past through the lens of gratitude or disappointment. And the way we characterize our history will determine whether we look toward our future with hopeful expectations or anxious trepidation. Scientists …
The Baby’s Not Dying 743.2
My commentary about caring more and judging less by giving a few dollars to panhandlers generated lots of letters, most disagreeing with me. Here’s another story likely to agitate some of you. A man named Jack was rushing home to tell his family about a $1,000 bonus check he’d unexpectedly received at work. Before he got to his car, a …
Emotional Resilience 743.1
Despite romanticized myths about the gloriously carefree teenage years, adolescence has always been an emotional battlefield where young people must fight their way through insecurity, depression and anger. For many teens, classrooms, playgrounds and hallways are hostile environments where name-calling, malicious gossip, taunting, and physical bullying regularly threaten their emotional and physical well-being Technology has not made kids meaner but …
The Pursuit of Human Perfection 742.5
Jews all over the world are in the midst of a ten-day period called the High Holy Days. It starts with Rosh Hashanah, the celebration of the New Year, and ends with Yom Kippur, a solemn day of atonement. The overriding theme is the pursuit of human perfection and the obligation of each person continually assess and improve his character, …
How Good Do I Have to Be? 742.4
Years ago, Rabbi Steven Carr Reuben told the story of a little girl who learned to tie her shoes for the first time. After a moment of triumphant celebration, she got sad, almost despondent. Her mystified parents asked why she wasn’t happier. The little girl acknowledged that she was proud of her achievement, but she sobbed, “Now I’ll have to …
The Power of One 741.3
Reading about the 31-year-old “rogue trader” arrested in London for unauthorized transactions that cost the Swiss Bank UBS $2 billion caused me to think about the power of one person. I’m not talking about great heroes and villains who changed the course of history, but smaller acts by ordinary people. There are lots of angles to thinking about the power …
It’s Your Job to Enjoy Your Job 739.1
Labor Day is, first and foremost, a day off from work to do something you enjoy, or to catch up on domestic tasks awaiting your attention. It’s also an ideal time to think about the role that work plays in your life. For some, work is a necessary evil. It’s doing what they have to do to make a decent …
It’s Not Easy 738.4
Let’s be honest. Ethics is not for wimps. It’s not easy being a good person. It’s not easy to be honest when it might be costly, to play fair when others cheat, or to keep inconvenient promises. It’s not easy to stand up for our beliefs and still respect differing viewpoints. It’s not easy to control powerful impulses, to be …
What Did You Expect Him To Do? 738.3
One of the highlights of my life as a dad – and having five kids, I’ve had quite a few – occurred on a Saturday afternoon when I was taking my then 13-year-old son Justin and his friend Aaron to a movie. As we entered the theater, I noticed the ticket seller had undercharged me, so I asked the boys …
The Power of Responsibility 737.5
It’s been said that the line between childhood and adulthood is crossed when we move from saying, “It got lost” to “I lost it.” Indeed, being accountable and understanding and accepting the role our choices play in the things that happen are crucial signs of emotional and moral maturity. That’s why responsibility is one of the main pillars of good …
Ramadan Kareem 736.3
Ramadan Kareem. Ramadan Mubarak. Kul ‘am wa enta bi-khair! (May every year find you in good health!) Please forgive my pronunciation, but I want to respectfully offer warm wishes and greetings to my Muslim brothers and sisters during the holy month of Ramadan. To those whose entire perspective of Islam and the Qur’an is shaped by fear and hatred of …
Deal or No Deal? 736.2
Sarah’s mom agreed to let her 16-year-old go to a party if she promised to be home by midnight. But as the Cinderella hour approached, Sarah did a quick risk/reward calculation. She knew her mom would be angry and probably ground her, but she was having so much fun she decided it was worth it. Sure enough, when she got …
I Wish Hospitals Were More Hospitable 735.5
Hospitals are super-sanitary institutions housing millions of dollars of technology and scores of trained medical professionals for the purpose of providing medical care for the sick and injured. I just spent some time with my daughter at one of the better hospitals in New York City. She received great treatment, but I wish hospitals were more hospitable. A hospitable place …
COMMENTARY: We Are All Ethical In Our Own Eyes
Think of the most ethical person you know. Do a lot of people come to mind or only a few? Are you having trouble thinking of anyone? If I asked that question of the people who know you well, how many would name you? Almost all? About half? Just a few? Unless this commentary makes you more humble, you will …
Authentic Apologies 734.2
“I’m sorry.” These are powerful words. Authentic apologies can work like a healing ointment on old wounds, dissolve bitter grudges, and repair damaged relationships. They encourage both parties to let go of toxic emotions like anger and guilt and provide a fresh foundation of mutual respect. But authentic apologies involve much more than words expressing sorrow; they require accountability, remorse, …
If You Change One Thing, You Change Everything 733.2
Looking back on your life, what would you change if you could? In the classic 1946 film It’s a Wonderful Life, the main character, a small-town bank officer played by Jimmy Stewart, is about to commit suicide when an angel shows him how different the lives of people in Bedford Falls would be if he hadn’t been born. The movie …
The Greyhound Principle 732.2
Racing dogs are trained to chase a mechanical rabbit that always goes a little faster than the fleetest dog. This causes them to run faster than they otherwise would. Companies that annually set overly ambitious performance objectives for their employees employ this greyhound principle. To a point, it works. Most people achieve more when expectations are set high. The strategy …
Even Our Schools Are Cheating 731.3
Most Americans condemn cheating in sports, business, and marriage, yet our culture is pervaded by cheating. Premier athletes use performance-enhancing drugs, cheating in business ravages our economy, and the media regularly exposes infidelity by prominent personalities and politicians. But it gets worse. Atlanta’s public school system, which won national recognition and millions of dollars of awards for apparent improvements in …
A Tale of Two Commentaries 731.1
Preface: The 90-second limit for my radio commentaries precludes a more thorough discussion of some issues. This “essay” is an expanded version of what was broadcast. Please remember my personal views in the commentaries, especially on controversial matters like these, are NOT views either endorsed or espoused by the Institute or the CHARACTER COUNTS! program. The Institute and CHARACTER COUNTS! …
Casey and O.J. 730.4
As a former law professor specializing in teaching trial practice, I watched hours and hours of the Casey Anthony murder trial with a keen professional eye. I thought Ms. Anthony’s lead attorney Jose Baez made some terrible decisions, including an opening statement proposing a totally unbelievable theory designed to excuse his client’s mountain of lies and explain how her two-year-old’s …
The Bodyguard of Lies 726.3
“Follow me around. I’m serious. If anybody wants to put a tail on me, go ahead.” This bold challenge by presidential candidate Gary Hart in 1987, bulwarking his denial that he was having an extramarital affair, started a new era in media ethics. Henceforth, sexual conduct and cover-up lies by politicians became fair game for the mainstream media because it …