COMMENTARY 971.1: HOW AND WHEN TO CONVEY HARD TRUTHS — Motive, Tact, Tone, and Timing

Trustworthiness is essential to good relationships, and honesty is essential to trustworthiness. Being honest isn’t simply telling the truth, though. It’s also being sincere and forthright. Thus, it’s just as dishonest to deceive someone by half-truths or silence as it is to lie. But what if honesty requires us to volunteer information that could be damaging or hurtful? For example, …

WORTH READING: How to Give Kind Criticism and Avoid Being Critical by Leo Babuta for Zen Habits

Why We Give Criticism Excerpted from Zen Habits  To help someone improve. Sometimes criticism is actual honest feedback, meant to help the person we’re criticizing. We want to help them get better. To see a change that we would like. If we regularly read a magazine or blog, for example, there might be something that often bothers us that we’d …

OBSERVATION: Authentic constructive criticism must be motivated by a sincere desire to help, and delivered in a way that engenders gratitude rather than defensiveness or resentment.

If you want to be a positive force in someone’s life, it’s wise to remember that few people are truly open to criticism of any sort from any source. If you want to grow, understand more, and get better at whatever you do, it’s wise to be open to learn from every sort of criticism from any source. Implicit in …

WORTH READING: What is Constructive Criticism?

An excerpt from WiseGeek.com: Constructive criticism is criticism kindly meant that has a goal of improving some area of another’s person’s life or work. Often constructive criticism refers specifically to the critique of someone else’s written or artistic work, in perhaps a teacher/student setting, that would allow that person to further improve the work or to improve their approach to …

OBSERVATION: How Buddha dealt with criticism

According to an ancient story, Buddha was known as a man who could not be provoked to anger or hostility. A man traveled hundreds of miles to test Buddha’s reputation. When he found Buddha, he immediately began to criticize everything he could; he insulted him, he challenged him, he did everything he could to offend Buddha. Buddha was unperturbed. He said, …

WORTH READING: 8 Helpful Ways To Deal With Critical People

Reposted from Personal Excellence blog by Celestine Chua 1. Don’t Take It Personally. Most of the times, their criticisms reflect more about themselves than about you. They react in this manner because of certain beliefs and frameworks they have about life. You may think the critical person is all out to get you, but it’s more likely he/she reacts in …

OBSERVATION: Giving Advice

Observations about advice: 1) Proverb: “To be successful is to follow the advice you give to others.” Why are we so much smarter, more sensible, and stronger when we are dealing with problems of others? 2) Samuel Coleridge: “Advice is like snow; the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind.”  Giving …