Hang in There! It Will Get Better 717.1

While researching the bullying issue for a CHARACTER COUNTS! seminar, I came across Vicky Bell’s blog, where she posted a letter to her daughter in college. I think her advice moving and wise.

Here’s an abridged version:

Hello my girl . . . You may have heard about the NJ college student who killed himself because his roommate posted a videotape of him having sex with another guy. My mommy job requires that I remind you: Nothing ruins your life forever. NOTHING.

If that young man had only waited a couple of weeks . . . he’d have gotten past it. People have short memories- life would have gotten better, much better. . . . A few awkward moments and then life goes on.

But when you are young you don’t know that even the awkward moments are fleeting. On this, you just have to trust the old people. . . . Awful things happen, [but] . . . somehow time goes by and it gets better. I promise you, it ALWAYS gets better.

Never, ever think something is unfixable. . . . NOTHING you do could be so awful you can’t get past it.

And if someone is mean to you, and it isn’t something you can ignore– seek out people to talk to about it. Surround yourself with people who are supportive. . . . Right now- before you might need such help- think about who you would talk to if needed. In the midst of turmoil . . . having a plan makes it easier to find help . . . . Remember, there are always alternatives. Always.

This mom is right. We can’t make the pain go away, but it will go away. Just hang in there!

This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts.

Comments 5

  1. Great article it sums up most things that will come and go you have to remember every thing in life will not be easy and you will fail at some things or most things but you have to learn from your mistakes and hang in their if you don’t and create a dramatic stress like that person did in school you will be a failure for the rest of your life, just like what was said nothing is unfix able you can make it happen you really can do anything you put your mind too if you want to, you will get past the hard times you go trow just try to think of something else or do something else in general so your mind will get off that focus, time will pass and you will become wiser.

  2. I cannot tell you how timely this is for me today. My elementary school age son is being “bullied” by his school bus driver, being written up every day for nothing (verfied by the principal by viewing the bus tapes). Despite the fact that the principal refuses to give him consequences – since he is not doing anything – just the experience of being written up so often is distressing and soul destroying for his young man with a strong sense of justice.
    I’m going to go home tonight and tell him to “hang in there, it will get better” ~ whilst continuing to work with the school to understand and better the situation.

  3. Thanks for sharing this letter and the link to the website. I realise you said you edited the letter for space reasons, but feel that the following bit of the original letter is really crucial.
    “Finally, don’t be mean. Don’t let other people be mean. Stand up for the underdog, protect those who aren’t as smart or confident or easygoing as yourself. Treat people’s feelings like fragile little puppies – if you play with them – be gentle.”
    It’s easy, when we are being picked on to want to get even.

  4. A few years ago I found myself in a situation that I thought I could not keep on going. My best friends were all away on long vacations, the HUGE problem I found myself in was of such a delicate matter it could not be shared with just about anyone. The only one I had was God, and now I know that is ALL I needed. I truly believe it was part of His plan, my faith is so strong now, I am certain I can overcome anything with Him. I hope you know that no matter what you have done, our Father in heaven is waiting for you with open arms and has already forgiven you, and you can rest under His care.

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