COMMENTARY 776.2: Eighteen Random Life Rules

I love maxims, those concise capsules of worldly wisdom. I collect them and write them and, of course, love to share them. Here are 18 random rules of life worth posting on your mirror or, better yet, using as dinner-time discussion starters. Find the lesson in every failure and you’ll never fail. The likelihood that you’re right is not increased …

COMMENTARY 775.1: Mothers — Saints or Scapegoats?

What class of people has been more glorified or vilified than Mothers? On the one hand, we are frequently confronted with an idealized image of the sainted, angel mother, often with white hair and hands callused from work. She is the embodiment of the most beneficent human qualities: nurturing, loving, devoted and wise. And she  is the favorite subject of …

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT FOR TEENS: Trust, Promises, and Good Friends

Hi, this is Michael Josephson with Something to Think About. Sarah was 16 and when her mom saw that her grades were slipping she said “No parties until you get your grades up.” This led to a nasty fight with Sarah calling her mom unfair and her mom calling Sarah irresponsible.  Later Sara tried a different approach. “You’re right,” she …

OBSERVATION: Authentic constructive criticism must be motivated by a sincere desire to help, and delivered in a way that engenders gratitude rather than defensiveness or resentment.

If you want to be a positive force in someone’s life, it’s wise to remember that few people are truly open to criticism of any sort from any source. If you want to grow, understand more, and get better at whatever you do, it’s wise to be open to learn from every sort of criticism from any source. Implicit in …

COMMENTARY 773.1: Good Ethics Make Better Relationships

While I believe that good things tend to happen to people who consistently choose the high road, the correlation between ethics and success is a loose one at best. Thus, it’s pretty hard to sincerely promote ethics by appeals to self-interest. What’s more, when self-interest is the controlling justification for moral behavior, moral reasoning is replaced by a pragmatic cost-benefit …

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT #4: I Just Have to Outrun You

Hi, this is Michael Josephson with something to think about. During a camping trip, Marie and Jessica were hiking in a trail when they saw a big black bear. Marie started to take off her backpack. Jessica whispered, “What are you going to do?” Marie answered, “I’m going to run for it.”

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT: Leadership on a Bus

Mr. Martin told his English class that leadership was “influencing meaningful change either through your own conduct or by motivating others to act,” and he assigned an essay requiring students to write about a personal experience with leadership. The students groaned, insisting they couldn’t think of anything, so Mr. Martin read an essay submitted last semester:

COMMENTARY 771.4: The Responsibility to Decide

Frank is a new supervisor who wants to do well. Maria consistently comes in late. When he confronts her, she makes a joke out of it. Hoping to win friendship and loyalty, Frank is painfully patient with her, but Pat, a conscientious employee, urges him to do more. Soon others begin to come in late, and Pat quits. Frank feels …

OBSERVATION: Expressing Appreciation — Why is it that so many of us wait until it is too late to experience and express real gratitude to those who gave us the gifts of love, wisdom, and encouragement?

Why do we wait to put our deepest emotions into eulogies? Everyone should have the pleasure of hearing the eulogies they have earned. The greatest gift you can give someone you love is to express sincerely your appreciation for the things that they have given you. It might be a parent, grandparent, brother or sister. Maybe it’s a teacher, coach …

Don’t Miss This One! OBSERVATION & WORTH SEEING: Out of the Closet. I know many of the people who follow my work have a deeply grounded religious belief that homosexuality is a sin. Many fortify their convictions by believing that God would not make any child homosexual and, therefore, that it is a choice to be gay or lesbian. Whether you fall into this group or simply want to better understand the human dimension of this aspect of the bullying problem, please take the time to watch the videos included here. It could change your perspective, maybe even your life.

First, a preface: Young people are harassed, humiliated, and intimidated at school for all sorts of reasons – their looks, the way they talk, their race, and more — but students who are or are perceived to be gay are subjected to the most persistent and pernicious forms of bullying. This has led to more suicides than any other cause …

COMMENTARY 769.5: Sharpen Your Ax

Ben was a new lumberjack who swung his ax with great power. He could fell a tree in 20 strokes, and in the first few days he produced twice as much lumber as anyone else. By week’s end, he was working even harder, but his lead was dwindling. One friend told him he had to swing harder. Another said he …

COMMENTARY: The Guy in the Glass

Years ago I came across a poem entitled “The Man in the Glass” by Dale Wimbrow. I looked it up on the Internet and discovered a website maintained by his children that contains the original version written in 1934 and published in The American Magazine as “The Guy in the Glass.”

COMMENTARY 768.3: Shaping Values, Shaping Lives

Blessed with the opportunities and burdened with the aggravations of raising four teenage daughters , my wife Anne and I are profoundly aware of the importance of instilling good values and decision-making skills to help them be safe, successful, happy, and good. I think we’re doing a good job, but we know that isn’t enough. We worry about the values …

Guest Post: Black & White by Barbara Gruener

Editor’s note: Today we bring you a guest post from school counselor and friend of CHARACTER COUNTS! Barbara Gruener. You can keep up with Barbara’s thoughts on character and education at her blog, The Corner on Character. I grew up in a black-and-white world (literally), surrounded by Holstein cows, on our family farm.  The motto on the sign in front …

COMMENTARY 766.1: The Paradoxical Commandments

In 1968, when Kent M. Keith* was a 19-year-old sophomore at Harvard University, he wrote “The Paradoxical Commandments” as part of a booklet for student leaders. He describes the Commandments as guidelines for finding personal meaning in the face of adversity: 1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway. 2. If you do good, people will accuse you …

COMMENTARY 765.4: Using All Your Strength

A young boy was walking with his father along a country road. When they came across a very large tree branch, the boy asked, “Do you think I could move that branch?” His father answered, “If you use all your strength, I’m sure you can.” The boy tried mightily to lift, pull, and push the branch, but he couldn’t move …

COMMENTARY 764.2: Everyone Needs a “Me File”

During a dinner with friends I mentioned an e-mail I’d received from a 13-year-old thanking me for the way my commentaries had influenced his life. I was clearly proud of the note, and Sally Kinnamon said I should save this and other affirming mementos and put them in a “Me File.” At first I thought she was being sarcastic, but …

COMMENTARY 763.3: Willful Blindness: Ignoring the Moral Issues Before Us

On a bitter cold night, a Russian countess was taken to a play in a horse-drawn carriage. The driver asked the Lady whether they could take shelter in a nearby inn until the play was over as he was not feeling well. The Countess thought the question impertinent and directed the two men to wait outside with the carriage in …

QUOTES: All About Courage — 64 Great Quotes on the Nature of Courage

The Josephson institute is a nonprofit organization that depends on contributions from people like you. Please help us make a more ethical society or simply show your gratitude for whatever value you find in our work by making a tax-deductible donation at http://goo.gl/uUAix See Images of and Words of Courage here. QUOTES ON COURAGE Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human …

WORTH READING: Political Courage and Integrity – Profiles in Courage

In 1956, Profiles in Courage, written by John F. Kennedy, the junior senator from Massachusetts. was published. The book won the Pulitzer prize for biography. There is substantial controversy as to whether Senator Kennedy, who was elected President in 1960, was the true and sole author of the book and the circumstances surrounding the winning of the Pulitzer Prize. I address …

COMMENTARY 763.1: Dishonest Merchants Don’t Deserve Your Business

Some time ago, I received a handwritten message on a yellow self-stick note attached to a torn-out page from a magazine about a new book. The note said, “Mike, thought you might be interested.” It was signed “L.” It was sent in a non-business envelope with a stamp, but no return address. My assistant thought it was a personal message …

COMMENTARY 762.3: The True Meaning of Love – Love Is Not A Mirage

If we can get beyond the corny red heart clichés and commercialism surrounding Valentine’s Day, there’s real value in celebrating the idea of love. Okay, love doesn’t always conquer all and it’s rarely forever, but I worry that the hearts and souls of a whole generation are being corrupted by images that mock and trivialize the beauty and sanctity of …

OBSERVATION: The Perfect Boyfriend

The perfect boyfriend. Someone whose heart beats faster when he sees you, thinks of you as beautiful instead of hot, calls you back when you hang up on him, will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat or will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for a young man who will kiss away your tears, and …