Reading the letters responding to my comments on gay rights I have found that many of the people who have expressed an opinion — whether for or against gay rights — exhibit the same tendency (one that I find very troubling) to demonize those with contrary views. I think it is just as bigoted of those who agree with my …
OBSERVATION: STIRRING THE POT ON THE GAY RIGHTS DISCOURSE. Reading all the letters responding to my views on gay rights, the arguments/beliefs against my position seem to center on one or more of these beliefs: 1) the word of God is clear and unequivocal homosexuality (or at least homosexual acts) are a sin and gay and lesbians who seek to marry are sinners, 2) being gay is a choice, a bad choice to give into temptation (there is no genetic disposition toward homosexuality) . . .
3) people who support gay marriage and condone homosexuality are not only wrong, they have bad character, 4) allowing gay and lesbian people to marry will destroy or at least undermine the institution of marriage. What is your view on these beliefs?
Take Control of Your Life
You are what you are today because of the choices you made yesterday, and the choices you make today will make you what you are tomorrow. Take control of your life. Choose wisely. – Michael Josephson
Memo From Michael: Gratitude, Compassion and Civic Duty in the Wake of Sandy
The unprecedented devastation caused by Hurricane Sandy challenges us to be both more grateful for all we have and compassionate, genuinely compassionate, toward those who have suffered life-altering losses. At the same time, a very important election is coming up and it deserves your attention and participation. It’s frustrating that many of us live in solid blue or red states, …
COMMENTARY 798.3: A Person of Character
Let’s face it, it’s not easy to become a person of character. It takes a good heart, but it also requires wisdom to know right from wrong and the discipline to do right even when it’s costly, inconvenient or difficult. Becoming a person of character is a lifelong quest to be better. A person of character values honesty and integrity …
COMMENTARY 796.5: Curing Victimitis
Watch your thoughts; they lead to attitudes. Watch your attitudes; they lead to words. Watch your words; they lead to actions. Watch your actions; they lead to habits. Watch your habits; they form your character. Watch your character; it determines your destiny. These words of unknown origin tell us that our silent and often subconscious choices shape our future. Every …
COMMENTARY 792.5: The Journey Through Adolescence
One of the toughest jobs in the world is being a teenager. Everything is in transition. Everything is intense — even apathy. Kids on the brink of adulthood have to cope with inconsistencies and conflicts. The desire to be special and different clashes with the need to belong and fit in. The desire for independence collides with an aversion to …
COMMENTARY 789.2: Slow Dance
I once heard the chairman and CEO of a huge public company tell a roomful of ambitious, hardworking, dedicated executives that if he had to do it all over again, he would have spent more time with his family. That’s not news, but to Type-A personalities, it’s easier said than done. David L. Weatherford’s poem “Slow Dance” sends the message …
COMMENTARY 788.4: The Golden Rule as the Road of Honor
Five hundred years before the birth of Christ, Confucius was asked, “Is there one word that may serve as a rule of practice for all one’s life?” He answered, “Reciprocity. What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.” This basic principle, now called the Golden Rule, can be found in every major religion and philosophy. …
COMMENTARY 788.3: Delusions of Grandeur
Think of the most ethical person you know. Do a lot of people come to mind or only a few? Are you having trouble thinking of anyone? If I asked that question of the people who know you well, how many would name you? Almost all? About half? Just a few? Unless this commentary makes you more humble, you will …
COMMENTARY 788.1: Put the Big Rocks in First
There’s a well-traveled story about a teacher who showed his class a one-gallon jar and a dozen large rocks. After a little rearranging, he got all the rocks into the jar, filling it to the top. He then dumped a bag of gravel into the jar until the spaces between the rocks were filled. Next he poured sand into the …
COMMENTARY 787.1: How Much Do You Want It to Be?
A company was hiring a new CEO. After an extensive interview each finalist was asked one final question: “How much is two plus two?” Ann, an accountant, answered, forthrightly: “Four, of course.” Terry, who was an engineer, said, “It depends on whether you’re dealing with positive or negative numbers. The answer could be plus four, zero or minus four.” Chuck, …
COMMENTARY 785.3: Change Everything
Looking back on your life, what would you change if you could? In the classic 1946 film It’s a Wonderful Life, the main character, a small-town bank officer played by Jimmy Stewart, is about to commit suicide when an angel shows him how different the lives of people in Bedford Falls would be if he hadn’t been born. The movie is …
COMMENTARY 784.1: What You Do Is What You’ll Get
If you want to help your children do well in life there are a few things you can do. A high proportion of high achievers had two things in common: First, there were lots of books in their homes and a great emphasis on reading; Second, there was a family tradition of regularly eating dinner together. Filling a house with …
COMMENTARY 783.3: Noah’s Term Paper
Noah really needed an ‘A’ on a term paper. His friend Jason tells him that lots of kids “re-cycle” papers they don’t write and offers to give him a paper his older brother got an ‘A’ on three years ago. When Noah asked his for advice, his father hoped his son wouldn’t cheat but he didn’t want to be judgmental …
COMMENTARY 783.2: Family Values
Our values — the core beliefs that drive behavior — determine our character, our ethics and our potential. Thus, the most important thing we can do for our children is to stimulate them to develop positive values that will help them become wise, happy and good. This is no simple matter. The first step is to achieve greater clarity about …
COMMENTARY 782.1: Improving Your Life By Improving Your Mind
Our abilities to think, reason and learn are among the most powerful tools we have to make our lives safer, more comfortable and more fulfilling. Yet many of us simply do not develop our mental capacities. Although we can learn important information in school, the wise person in pursuit of self-improvement realizes that education is a lifelong process of expanding …
COMMENTARY 781.4: Making the Best from Adversity
No one wants pain, troubles or hardship, but it’s absolutely inevitable that we all will have plenty of each. And they won’t always come in forms we prefer, doses we think are manageable or at times of our choosing. Adversity is never welcome, but it is not necessarily our enemy. Still, the lesson we must teach our children is that …
COMMENTARY 781.2: How Honest Do you Have to Be When Applying for a Job?
Can a job applicant properly withhold information about a criminal record or being fired in a previous job? Can a woman who has just started dating properly say nothing about a previous marriage or abortion? These are problems of candor: When does an ethical person have a duty to reveal negative information about his past? First, let’s reinforce a basic …
COMMENTARY 781.1: Enough is Enough
What does it take to make you happy? How much do you have to have to be grateful? To the barefoot man, happiness is a pair of old shoes. To the man with old shoes, it’s a pair of new shoes. To the man with new shoes, it’s more stylish shoes. And, of course, the fellow with no feet would …
COMMENTARY 780.5: The Truth About Trust
Everyone seems to understand the importance of trust. No one seems to doubt the vital role that it plays in personal relationships, business and politics. We want to trust the people in our lives and we want them to trust us. Trust is so hard to earn and so easy to lose. So why do so many trust seekers resort …
COMMENTARY 780.4: Digging and Filling Holes
Charlie, a road crew supervisor for highway landscapers, came upon a pair of workers from one of his crews seemingly hard at work. He watched one fellow dig a hole while his partner waited a few minutes and then filled the hole. After a few repetitions, Charlie demanded an explanation. The hole-filler was offended: “We’ve been doing this job for …
Commentary 779.5: The Carrot, the Egg, and the Coffee Bean
Let’s face it. Painful personal trauma and tragedy — like illness or injury, death of a loved one, loss of a job or an unexpected breakup of a relationship — are unavoidable. The question is: Will these private calamities erode our capacity to be happy or cause us to become stronger and better able to live a meaningful and fulfilling …
COMMENTARY 779.1: Dying From the Cold Within
One of the great challenges to our humanity is acknowledging and overcoming our natural tendency to think less of and discriminate against people who are different than us racially, ethnically, religiously or ideologically. Despite persistent rhetoric about prizing diversity, political debates often reflect disdain and contempt for those we disagree with and prejudices of all sorts are more readily stated. …
COMMENTARY 778.5: Learning From Pigeons
During an experiment, pigeons were put in cages with one green and one red button. In one cage, if the birds pecked the green button they would get food every time. In the other, the green button yielded food erratically and the pigeons had to persist to get enough food. In both cases, pecking the red button did nothing. Both …
COMMENTARY 778.2: Who’s Right and Who’s Wrong?
On many issues of morality we are deeply divided. The volume and virulence of disagreement on issues like stem cell research, abortion, and gay unions is testimony to the undeniable reality that millions of Americans are lined up on opposite sides of a chasm, appalled at the ethical poverty of those they disagree with. According to a May 2005 Gallup poll, about …
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT FOR TEENS: Failing the Integrity Test
This is Michael Josephson with something to think about. Chad and three of his friends were college seniors and they all had to take an important physics exam on Monday. Chad persuaded his buddies to take a weekend trip several hundred miles away to go to a rock concert. They all agreed they would study in the car driving there …
COMMENTARY 777.3: Keep Your Fork
When a pessimist is told there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, he’s likely to assume it’s an onrushing train. According to journalist Sydney Harris, “A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past; he’s prematurely disappointed in the future.” Pessimism and cynicism are fashionable these days, but it’s the people who see and …