Hi, this is Michael Josephson with Something to Think About. Sarah was 16 and when her mom saw that her grades were slipping she said “No parties until you get your grades up.” This led to a nasty fight with Sarah calling her mom unfair and her mom calling Sarah irresponsible. Later Sara tried a different approach. “You’re right,” she …
COMMENTARY 774.1: Acting on Principle and Good Intentions
I once heard a story about an emergency medical technician I’ll call Jake who was summoned to help an unconscious woman. When he arrived, she had no pulse. From her color and dilated eyes, he could tell she’d suffered serious brain damage. Still, he did his job exceptionally well, trying over and over to restart her heart. She finally regained …
COMMENTARY 773.2 & SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT #5: Will, Fern, and the Power of Encouragement
Two frogs named Will and Fern fell into a deep pit together. At first, they thought it would be easy to jump out. But after lots of failed attempts they cried for help and a crowd of animals gathered around the pit. Everyone agreed it was hopeless so they urged Will and Fern to accept their fate. The harder the …
WORTH WATCHING: Special Athletes Acting in Special Ways
Here’s an inspiring little video about “true victory.”
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT #4: I Just Have to Outrun You
Hi, this is Michael Josephson with something to think about. During a camping trip, Marie and Jessica were hiking in a trail when they saw a big black bear. Marie started to take off her backpack. Jessica whispered, “What are you going to do?” Marie answered, “I’m going to run for it.”
COMMENTARY 769.1: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
R- E- S- P- E- C- T – Aretha Franklin reminded us how it’s spelled, but a lot of us need coaching on how to show it. In both personal and political relationships, the failure to treat each other with respect is generating incivility, contempt, and violence. There’s an important distinction between respecting a person in the sense that we …
COMMENTARY 767.5: Two Sets of Proud Parents
I received an e-mail with a story worth sharing. Only the names have been changed to preserve privacy. Doug is the proud and loving father of Emma, a high school junior who takes a leadership class responsible for putting on dances and other student events. All student body officers must take the class, but a number of other kids like …
COMMENTARY 767.4: Careful — Your Children May Be Watching
Matt, an eighth grade teacher, was in a huge hurry. With guests arriving at his home shortly, he had a small list of things to buy. With 14 items in his basket, he decided to chance it and use the “10 items or less” express line. Matt’s heart pounded when he saw Phil, one of his students, come toward him. …
COMMENTARY 767.3: Improve the World — Be Nice!
Marta was a hard-working single mother. Last week, at church, her minister urged the congregation to improve the world by doing more to help others. He’s got to be kidding, she thought, I can barely make ends meet and provide my children with basic necessities. Still, she felt guilty – “maybe I should be doing more.” So, on the bus to work …
COMMENTARY 766.5: Coaching a Winning Machine
When Larry volunteered to coach a kids’ football team he wanted to help each youngster develop not only their football skills but their character and work habits. He also wanted mold these youngsters into a winning machine. Early on, however, he saw that these goals were not always compatible. In the end, his desire to win won, and he convinced …
COMMENTARY 766.3: Doctoring With A Heart
When you visit a medical specialist, an emergency room, or a patient in the hospital, are you ever struck by a sense that many doctors are so focused on the scientific aspects of diagnosis and treatment of illness or injury that they ignore, maybe even become annoyed by, things like pain, fear, or anxiety? In her book Medicine as Ministry, …
COMMENTARY 766.1: The Paradoxical Commandments
In 1968, when Kent M. Keith* was a 19-year-old sophomore at Harvard University, he wrote “The Paradoxical Commandments” as part of a booklet for student leaders. He describes the Commandments as guidelines for finding personal meaning in the face of adversity: 1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway. 2. If you do good, people will accuse you …
COMMENTARY 764.5: Being Right or Being Kind
Watching parents struggle to keep their young children quiet on a recent plane trip reminded me of how stressful traveling was a few years ago when my kids were really young. My wife Anne and I would do everything we could to keep our kids from annoying other passengers, but no matter how hard we tried, one would always scream …
COMMENTARY 764.4: Don’t Miss the Chance
A listener got me thinking about the challenge of dealing with aging parents who become more and more needy and the conflicts one is bound to feel. It motivated me to write this poem: Don’t Miss the Chance They said I was lucky my mom lived near, But she was pretty old and it wasn’t so clear.
COMMENTARY 764.2: Everyone Needs a “Me File”
During a dinner with friends I mentioned an e-mail I’d received from a 13-year-old thanking me for the way my commentaries had influenced his life. I was clearly proud of the note, and Sally Kinnamon said I should save this and other affirming mementos and put them in a “Me File.” At first I thought she was being sarcastic, but …
COMMENTARY 764.1: Choosing Caring Over Judging (The Ethics of Giving to Panhandlers)
Every time my wife and I leave a Lakers game we’re confronted by half a dozen or more beggars with outreached cups. Usually we try to avoid eye contact and pass quickly – annoyed rather than moved. I’ve got lots of justifications for this callous indifference:
COMMENTARY: Hurrah for Hollywood! This Year’s Crop is Rich in Films that Inform, Move and Inspire 759.3
I know I’m out of my depth as a movie critic, but I am venturing into this new territory because there’s so much criticism about Hollywood that we don’t always give ample credit for the substantial number of truly wonderful movies that teach, move, and inspire, as well as entertain. And from my narrow perspective as an ethicist, I am grateful …
COMMENTARY: Changing Self-Limiting Beliefs and Bad Behavior 758.5
Shavonne, a third-grade teacher, was at the end of her rope with disciplinary problems, but she wasn’t enthusiastic when she was told that her school had adopted the CHARACTER COUNTS! program. Now she was expected to explicitly seek to instill and enhance in her students core ethical values like honesty, respect, and responsibility, and to help them develop positive social …
COMMENTARY:The Wisdom and Philosophy of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. 758.3
For a man who never reached the age of 40, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., left a powerful and important body of thought. He was a preacher and orator, so rather than writing in the form of books or treatises, Dr. King spoke to the world in sermons and speeches and a few articles. His impact and image as a …
COMMENTARY: Living a Life That Matters 757.1
I saw a cartoon showing an old king checking in at the gates of heaven. He introduced himself as “Edward The Good.” The gatekeeper with a large book in front of him said, “Well, Eddie, we’ll be the judge of that.” The point is that, in the end, generous self-appraisals won’t matter. Our epitaphs will be written and eulogies delivered …
COMMENTARY: A Mother’s Message About Bullying: Hang in There. It Will Get better. 756.5
While researching the bullying issue for a CHARACTER COUNTS! seminar, I came across Vicky Bell’s blog, where she posted a letter to her daughter in college. I think her advice moving and wise. Here’s an abridged version: Hello my girl. . . You may have heard about the NJ college student who killed himself because his roommate posted a videotape …
COMMENTARY: The Seven Cs of Character 756.2
As you consider your goals for the New Year, I hope you’ll think about working on your character. No, you’re not too old and I don’t mean to imply you’re a bad person. As I’ve said often, “you don’t have to be sick to get better.” In fact, it’s a lot easier to make a good person better than a …
WORTH READING: What is Character?
An oldie and a goodie: Read and listen to “What is Character?“
COMMENTARY: Unkind Words Are Weapons 752.2
With four teenage daughters, I frequently find myself correcting, disciplining, or simply protesting unnecessary and unkind comments certain to anger or wound a sister and evoke counterattacks that fill the air with nastiness. Hoping to get them to think before they speak in the future, I often ask, “What did you expect to accomplish by that remark?” and “Did it …
KINDNESS
See all the resources at Random Acts of Kindness website. Random Acts of Kindness
COMMENTARY: A Parent’s Love for the Family Treasure 751.4
There are all kinds of love. The passionate romantic love immortalized and often fantasized by poets and novelists; Platonic love among friends, the love of humanity preached by missionaries and ministers, the love of country, and even the love of our work. I’ve been fortunate to have experienced all of these forms but none has impressed me more than the deep, enduring …