COMMENTARY 770.1: Respect Means Knowing When to Back Off

I’ve talked before about the ethical obligation to treat others with respect by attentive listening. Today, I want to talk about the flip side of respect: the duty to back off and accept the fact that while others should listen to us, we can’t demand that they agree with us. Such unreasonable demands are especially prevalent when someone in authority …

COMMENTARY 769.5: Sharpen Your Ax

Ben was a new lumberjack who swung his ax with great power. He could fell a tree in 20 strokes, and in the first few days he produced twice as much lumber as anyone else. By week’s end, he was working even harder, but his lead was dwindling. One friend told him he had to swing harder. Another said he …

COMMENTARY: The Guy in the Glass

Years ago I came across a poem entitled “The Man in the Glass” by Dale Wimbrow. I looked it up on the Internet and discovered a website maintained by his children that contains the original version written in 1934 and published in The American Magazine as “The Guy in the Glass.”

COMMENTARY 769.1: R-E-S-P-E-C-T

R- E- S- P- E- C- T – Aretha Franklin reminded us how it’s spelled, but a lot of us need coaching on how to show it. In both personal and political relationships, the failure to treat each other with respect is generating incivility, contempt, and violence. There’s an important distinction between respecting a person in the sense that we …

QUOTE: “Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” — Bernard Baruch

[We are glad you visited us to find out the story on this well known quote. The Josephson Institute is a nonprofit organization devoted to increasing the ethical quality of individual and personal decision making.  I hope you’ll browse our other entries and subscribe to our What Will Matter blog at www.whatwillmatter.com (it’s free) and/or our What Will Matter Facebook https://www.facebook.com/WhatWillMatter?ref=hl. …

COMMENTARY 768.5: If You’re in a Hole, Stop Digging.

Most of us have lied to get out of trouble. From childhood denials (“It wasn’t me!”) to adult fabrications (“The check is in the mail…”), what seem like harmless falsehoods easily fall from our tongues. And then we make up more excuses or tell more lies to protect the first one. Soon the “cover-up” is more serious and credibility-damaging than …

COMMENTARY 768.4: I’m Only a One-Star

Years ago I was talking to a group of Army generals about the way politicians often treat the defense budget as an all-purpose public works fund to help bring money into their districts. One general admitted, “Yes, if the chairman of the Appropriations Committee comes from a place that makes trucks, we’re probably going to buy those trucks. That’s the …

COMMENTARY 768.3: Shaping Values, Shaping Lives

Blessed with the opportunities and burdened with the aggravations of raising four teenage daughters , my wife Anne and I are profoundly aware of the importance of instilling good values and decision-making skills to help them be safe, successful, happy, and good. I think we’re doing a good job, but we know that isn’t enough. We worry about the values …

COMMENTARY 768.1: We Shape Our Own Character

There’s no doubt that our character has a profound effect on our future. What we must remember, however, is not merely how powerful character is in influencing our destiny, but how powerful we are in shaping our own character and, therefore, our own destiny. Character may determine our fate, but character is not determined by fate.

QUOTES: The Best Wise and Witty Quotes about Children and Parenting

We are glad you visited us to find this selection of quotes on a topic that means so much to me – children and parenting. The Josephson Institute is a nonprofit organization devoted to increasing the ethical quality of individual and personal decision making.  I hope you’ll browse our other entries and subscribe to our What Will Matter blog at …

WORTH READING: Top 5 Strategies for Teaching Your Children to Behave

From Boystown: Children are great learning machines, but they learn more through experience than they do from their parents talking. Below are five strategies for teaching your children how to behave. Teach children acceptable and unacceptable behavior immediately after the act.  Don’t wait. For important matters such as commands or instructions speak less; one or two words for every year

WORTH WATCHING: Parenting on Facebook. Dad’s rant against 15-year-old’s disrespectful and profane Facebook post ends with shooting her laptop. Gets 31 million views and sets off national controversy.

In February 2012, a North Carolina dad named Tommy Jordan discovered a Facebook post by his 15-year-old daughter that trashed him and complained about chores in a manner that most would agree was disrespectful and profane. He videotaped his response and ended his 8-minute rant by literally shooting her laptop. He posted the video on her Facebook profile and it went viral …

COMMENTARY 767.5: Two Sets of Proud Parents

I received an e-mail with a story worth sharing. Only the names have been changed to preserve privacy. Doug is the proud and loving father of Emma, a high school junior who takes a leadership class responsible for putting on dances and other student events. All student body officers must take the class, but a number of other kids like …

COMMENTARY 767.4: Careful — Your Children May Be Watching

Matt, an eighth grade teacher, was in a huge hurry. With guests arriving at his home shortly, he had a small list of things to buy. With 14 items in his basket, he decided to chance it and use the “10 items or less” express line. Matt’s heart pounded when he saw Phil, one of his students, come toward him. …

Guest Post: Black & White by Barbara Gruener

Editor’s note: Today we bring you a guest post from school counselor and friend of CHARACTER COUNTS! Barbara Gruener. You can keep up with Barbara’s thoughts on character and education at her blog, The Corner on Character. I grew up in a black-and-white world (literally), surrounded by Holstein cows, on our family farm.  The motto on the sign in front …

COMMENTARY 767.2: Teaching Our Children To Be Better Than Us

Do parents have moral standing to impose standards on their children that they themselves did not follow when they were kids? Is it ever ethical for parents to lie to a child about their youthful experiences? These are important questions because it’s a parent’s duty to teach, enforce, advocate, and model good behavior for their kids. Sure, it’d be easier …

OBSERVATION: “The love of sports is deeply embedded in our national consciousness. The values of millions of participants and spectators are directly and dramatically influenced by the values conveyed by organized sports.” — Josephson Institute, Arizona Sports Summit Accord.

In 1999, the Josephson Institute of Ethics convened  a 3-day summit in Arizona with 40 of the most influential leaders in sports including John Wooden, Bob Costas and many of the countries most successful athletic directors, coaches and university presidents. The result was a  document referred to as the Arizona Sports Summit Accord which

COMMENTARY 767.1: A Coach’s Dilemma

A high school football coach wrote to tell me his team was going to the state finals, but he was troubled. An English teacher had caught three of his players cheating on an exam they had to pass to remain eligible. He told the coach he had passed them anyway, “for the good of the school.”

COMMENTARY 766.5: Coaching a Winning Machine

When Larry volunteered to coach a kids’ football team he wanted to help each youngster develop not only their football skills but their character and work habits. He also wanted mold these youngsters into a winning machine. Early on, however, he saw that these goals were not always compatible. In the end, his desire to win won, and he convinced …