Thank You, Dad for always being there for being strong yet showing you cared. For being my protector and setting the rules for the rides, the money, and the help with school. For all the times I was grounded for my own good I may not have been happy, but I always understood that I am lucky to be one …
COMMENTARY: Dealing With Toxic Relationships 750.2
Are there people in your life who regularly cause you to feel bad about yourself? Most of us care what others think of us, so knowing that someone doesn’t like us, or doesn’t approve of the judgments we’ve made, or doesn’t like how we look can be hurtful. And when we’re judged by someone whose approval we crave, such as a parent, …
OBSERVATION: Beware of emotional vampires.
Protect yourself from “emotional vampires,” people who suck you or the room dry of cheer or optimism. Look out for workmates, family members, even friends who consistently bring you down or drain your energy with endless complaining or relentless criticism. Seek out the people who bring out the best in you and be sure that you are not someone else’s …
OBSERVATION: Whatever we are today has been influenced by scores of good teachers who taught us how to do things, filled our minds with information and ideas, shaped our attitudes and our deepest beliefs, inspired our ambitions and helped us form our self-image.
Image: Mr. Feeny of Boy Meets World Most of our teachers were not educators; they were our parents, grandparents, friends, coaches and others. Still, a great school teacher can have a great impact. Many films and TV shows have centered on great teachers. Please look at the following list and tell us in the comments which is your favorite (and add …
COMMENTARY: Good Ethics Really Is Good Business 749.4
A challenge I frequently face while consulting with senior executives and boards of directors of public companies is a belief that their primary mandate is to make profits and enhance shareholder value. Thus, ethical principles like honesty, fairness, and caring are proper guides to decision making only to the extent that they can demonstrably improve profitability or incorporated into …
COMMENTARY: Ask What Can You Do for Your Country
In 1961, President John F. Kennedy, invoked my generation to “Ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.” We are fortunate to live in a free and democratic society where millions of civilians and soldiers serve their fellow citizens. Last Friday was Veteran’s Day and the weekend provided the nation …
COMMENTARY: What Your Checkbook and Calendar Say About Your Values 749.1
If I wanted to check your credit worthiness, I’d look at your balance sheet – what you have and what you owe – and I’d want to know about your history of paying your debts. If I wanted to know your values, I’d look at your calendar and checkbook. How come? Well, the term “values” refers
COMMENTARY: “Say it Ain’t So, Joe” 748.4
“Say it ain’t so, Joe” These words, directed at Shoeless Joe Jackson as he emerged from a courthouse where he and seven other White Sox players were accused of taking bribes to manipulate games, expressed the profound sense of betrayal and disappointment suffered when an idol falls from grace. Though Jackson, one of the finest players of his era, claimed …
COMMENTARY: Just Keep on Knocking 748.2
In the summer of my junior year in college I took a job as a door-to-door salesman for the Fuller Brush Company. My mother had just lost a long battle with cancer, and I wanted to earn enough money to have a photo of her turned into a painted portrait to give to my dad. What I earned depended entirely …
COMMENTARY: The Cowboy Code 748.1
I grew up in much simpler times. Television was in its infancy and the idea of a hero was exemplified by a white-hatted cowboy. There was a clarity and simplicity to the moral code of these heroes that left no doubt that there is a right and wrong. As I became more sophisticated, it was easy to ridicule these simplistic …
COMMENTARY: Changing Lives 747.1
Long ago when I was a law professor, I was at a conference and a man I didn’t recognize greeted me warmly. He said he wanted to thank me for changing his life. I was embarrassed as I listened to him tell me that he had met me after a speech I had given at his law school. He said …
COMMENTARY: Save the World, Daddy 746.3
Just before leaving for Nigeria I called my daughter Samara, a college freshman at NYU, to say good bye. After a short but pleasant conversation she closed with: “Save the world, daddy. I love you.” I suspect her remark was affectionate teasing, implying that her nearly 69 year old father is a sort of Don Quixote, jousting with wind mills …
COMMENTARY: Let the Butterfly Struggle 746.1
There’s a parable about a new mother who discovered a butterfly struggling mightily to escape its cocoon through a tiny opening at the top. She became concerned when the creature seemed to give up after making no progress. Certain that the butterfly just wouldn’t make it out without help, she enlarged the hole slightly. On its next try, the butterfly …
A Good Company and a Sharp Ax 745.3
Ben was a new lumberjack who swung his ax with such power he could fell a tree in 20 strokes. In his first few days he produced twice as much lumber as anyone else. He was making quite a reputation for himself but by week’s end, he was less productive. One friend told him he had to swing harder. Another …
All Good Things Come to an End 745.2
In 1997, Bob Sims, the program manager of KNX-1070 in Los Angeles, invited me to record short personal editorials looking at the world through the lens of ethics and character. Fortunately, the CHARACTER COUNTS! Commentaries drew a following and have run daily for more than 14 successive years, making it one of the longest radio features in radio history. It’s …
The Last KNX Broadcast 745.1
Every weekday for 745 weeks I’ve had the pleasure and privilege of sharing my thoughts from this great radio platform at KNX-1070. During that time, my life changed dramatically.
Leading by Inspiration 744.5
Why are negative management practices so prevalent? They include yelling, cursing, insults (sometimes masked in sarcasm or masquerading as jokes), criticizing subordinates in front of others, threatening demotion or termination, and talking to adults as if they were children. Why are so many managers insensitive to the demotivating impact of focusing almost exclusively on weaknesses and shortcomings without properly acknowledging …
If You Were Arrested for Kindness 744.4
If you were arrested for kindness, would there be enough evidence to convict you? Some people cheer up a room by entering it, others by leaving it. What do you bring to your interactions with workmates, friends, and family? Is it encouragement, optimism, or kind words? Or is it pessimism, criticism, or cynicism? People often forget what we say and …
I Choose to Live 744.2
Michael was always upbeat. Some found his relentless good moods annoying, but attempts to mock or belittle his cheerfulness were just more fuel for his good nature. Once he explained to a friend how he did it. “Every morning I look in the mirror and say good morning to myself. I see a note on the mirror that says ‘Choose,’ …
Converting Pessimists into Optimists 743.3
Every full life has its bright days and its dark days, its triumphs and defeats, its calm and stormy seas. All these high and low experiences could justify viewing the past through the lens of gratitude or disappointment. And the way we characterize our history will determine whether we look toward our future with hopeful expectations or anxious trepidation. Scientists …
The Baby’s Not Dying 743.2
My commentary about caring more and judging less by giving a few dollars to panhandlers generated lots of letters, most disagreeing with me. Here’s another story likely to agitate some of you. A man named Jack was rushing home to tell his family about a $1,000 bonus check he’d unexpectedly received at work. Before he got to his car, a …
Emotional Resilience 743.1
Despite romanticized myths about the gloriously carefree teenage years, adolescence has always been an emotional battlefield where young people must fight their way through insecurity, depression and anger. For many teens, classrooms, playgrounds and hallways are hostile environments where name-calling, malicious gossip, taunting, and physical bullying regularly threaten their emotional and physical well-being Technology has not made kids meaner but …
How Good Do I Have to Be? 742.4
Years ago, Rabbi Steven Carr Reuben told the story of a little girl who learned to tie her shoes for the first time. After a moment of triumphant celebration, she got sad, almost despondent. Her mystified parents asked why she wasn’t happier. The little girl acknowledged that she was proud of her achievement, but she sobbed, “Now I’ll have to …
Making the Best of Family Relationships 741.5
For most of us, there’s something both wonderful and worrisome about large family gatherings. On the good side, we often can experience real pleasure in
You’re Only Cheating Yourself 741.4
It’s in the news all the time – kids are cheating in school in new ways and at unprecedented rates. One of the reasons is the way schools and parents deal with or ignore the underlying issues of integrity and character. For instance, a popular thing adults say to discourage kids from cheating is, “You’re only cheating yourself.” Of course …
Kids Like To Win; Adults Need To Win 741.1
Whether you’re a sports fan or not, you have to acknowledge the powerful cultural influence that sports have on our culture. The values of millions of participants and spectators are shaped by the values conveyed in sports, including our views of what is permissible and proper in the competitive pursuit of personal goals. Professional sports and even highly competitive intercollegiate …
Worth More Than a Million Dollars 740.5
If you had the choice of winning $1 million in the lottery or saving a stranger’s life, which would you choose? I suspect many of you think you should say, “saving a life,” but what you are really thinking is how much better your life would be if you were rich. If the test was which act improves the world …
Are You the Father Your Child Deserves? 740.3
Listening to 9/11 survivors re-live the horrendous event that shattered their lives should remind us all to treat every day as a gift, and to treasure every opportunity to give or receive love. This is especially true for parents. A favorite story is about a 10-year-old boy who was told by his father not to expect him to go to …